Under Neon Loneliness

Four years we've been waiting for Skyfall as MGM crumbled and continued before finally Bond's 50th gets a 23rd film as celebration.  Unfortunately, it's not exactly Christmas.  I wanted to love Skyfall and have been waiting an age for it's release.  Between the restoration of old traditions and the long, lingering camera shots of watches and sunglasses there's something missing.  Bond's tale of self discovery and resurrection is, at times, painfully slow, always threatening to explode but not quite letting off the fireworks.  Having said that the reinvention of Craig's Bond is now complete and the series is aimed at the future whilst aiming maximum respect at it's past.

Skyfall is a celebration of all that has gone before and nods it's head and homages in ways more subtle and nuanced than the fateful 40th anniversary abomination Die Another Day.  From Craig's novel use of a Komodo Dragon to ape Moore through to the signature gun that would make Dalton jealous, Skyfall treads a familiar path within the Bond canon.

Skyfall is a tale of revenge and salvation yet this time it isn't Bond out for revenge set largely against a backdrop of London which makes the capital look glorious in this Olympic year.  Despite the obligatory globe hopping this is a very, very British Bond film.

We begin in Turkey and Bond stumbles across the loss of a laptop hard drive.  A hard drive full to popping with the list of secret agents undercover in terrorist cells.  All very Mission Impossible.  Accompanied by Eve, Bond is off on a slow burning car chase before ending up on a train.  Yes, another incarnation is about to take a turn for the worse on a train.  It seems that Bond will never learn.

Dead again

M's loyalty to the mission sees Eve put in an impossible position but she takes the shot and, not for the first time, an obituary is typed up for Commander James Bond.  Bond's descent into the watery depths begins a credit sequence that is probably the best in the franchise's history.  Adele's inevitable theme hovers above a hall of mirrors that would have made Scaramanga blush.

Bond's death and the loss of the list of agents is soon lost under a pile of bureaucracy as we are introduced to Mallory: Ralph Fiennes' implausibly trousered Whitehall enforcer.  Skyfall begins to open out, it's not going to be a run of the mill Bond film.  This time it's an M film.  In the face of enforced retirement M watches as her world is blown up around her.  Again Millbank is exploded and you wonder if the Tate avoided the shrapnel.  Thankfully, The Clampers are absent this time.  M and MI6 are being personally targeted by a cyber terrorist who obviously watched Jurassic Park.

The dust settling by the Thames is reported by CNN to a fully alive James Bond who has been contemplating life and apparent betrayal whilst playing stinging drinking games by the beach.  In desperate need of a shave Bond bombs back to Blighty and makes himself comfortable in George Smiley's front room (now resident to M.)  Bond's resurrection is hampered by standard procedure which has set about erasing him from history.  All seemingly very easy to do to an orphan with no next of kin.  Will the tearful restauranteurs and underemployed tailors of Bean's Goldeneye tirade really be all that's left?

M puts Bond back to work, but first he has to prove himself and we see the gruelling rebuilding of the secret agent in the gym.  Something that was painfully missing from Bruce Wayne's resurrection in The Dark Knight Rises.  Bond is put back on field duty and dispatched to Shanghai to find his old train companion.  Before he goes he has an appointment with The Doctor, sorry, the new Q.  I miss Desmond now more than ever.

Hunting Replicants and a massive jellyfish

This is where we see Bond for what he really is.  He's not a spy, he's a government hard man getting his hands dirty so politicians don't have to.  This is best seen in the airport as Bond's crap disguise leads him to follow his target up a skyscraper.  Shanghai has been ripped from the celluloid of Bladerunner as Bond stalks the shadows and reflections of an assassination.  The constant neon jellyfish haunting a fight in a glassy prison.  It's surprising Coca Cola didn't insist on their own little chunk of product placement.

The assassin's cryptic payment is a casino chip and we're off to Macao.  Skyfall has been drawn off a palette saturated with colour and the neon noir of Shangai juxtaposes with the seedy vibrancy of Macao almost perfectly.  No Lazar this time but a very seductive Severine.  She looks like a villain but you know deep down that she can't be as she's not ginger even if she does have very, very, pointy nails.

Camp blonde hair and an awesome island shirt

Through Severine we finally meet our villain.  It's been a slow slow-burner so far but now things are looking up.  The villain has his own island! Hurrah!  The spirit of Blofeld rejoice!  Not as impressive as a hollowed out volcano but still, it's a fucking island.

Out-camping the combined efforts of Mr Wind and Mr Kidd Javier Bardem's Silva or Rodriguez arrives via a lift to get all touchy feely with 007.  Silva has the hump with M for seemingly selling him out for being too good at his job.  It's a little hard to swallow such an Hispanic former MI6 agent after the diet of Dalton's Gibraltar, Brosnan and Bean et al.  Silva is captured and taken back to London and it's all a bit too easy.  Enshrined like Heath Ledger playing Hannibal Lecter, Silva finally reveals what M did to him and the perils of a cyanide capsule.  I don't know if cyanide has a best before date but judging by Silva's dental work and Blofeld-esque droop I think it might have.

The film has been building now for a while and we're beginning to feel like we're ready for an explosive finale.  In fact, we're beginning to need one.  Will Silva escape and Bond pursue him to a tropical demise?  No, Q's uber geekiness pops the plastic chamber and Bond lays a trap in Scotland after a suspiciously tame rush hour on the District Line and Silva's grasping assassination attempt in Westminster.

Scotland.

Scotland.  Forgive me for being underwhelmed but I've been brought up on mushroom shaped islands in the Far East and buried satellite dishes in Cuba.  Instead we're about to get a back story for Bond and a very sad ending.  At least the DB5 is back, the ejector seat still intact.  Up on the moors is a lonely old house.  A house called Skyfall.  Bond's ancestral home and lurking in the shadows (inexplicably) is Albert Finney with a shotgun.  Silva is being lured to Skyfall and Bond sets about drawing on his memories of seeing Home Alone to even up the playing field.

Our creaking finale is punctuated by dancing on ice and nail bombs before an attempt at salvation.  Mortally wounded and abandoned M is cradled by Silva who has gone full blown Joker and wants them both to die at an attempt at 'freedom.'  A death last reserved for Rosamund Pike paves the way for a tragic goodbye to Judi Dench.

Cradling M in his arms, Bond cries as he says goodbye to his replacement mother.  The affection he shows for his boss is on a par with Bond's (deliberately tearless) goodbye to Tracy and you feel that maybe he is now irretrievably broken.  All goes dark before we see Bond gazing out over the London skyline, isolated against the landmarks of the country he defends.  Bond is joined by Eve before the most obvious twist in a long time.  The running joke that Eve may be more suited to a desk job is cemented as she is formally introduced.  Perched behind her Sony Vaio it's difficult to see Moneypenny hot desking.  Instead she is the guardian of the man behind those leather cushioned doors.  Having proven himself to Bond earlier as more than just another bureaucrat Mallory assumes the initial and tosses a dossier towards Bond.  Top secret and for 007, now that he's shaken off his case of Brosnan's Shoulder, a new mission.

The reboot is complete and all the true Bondian elements have been restored.  So now, perhaps, we shake off the shackles of Jason Bourne and have a little fun?

James Bond will return and I think I want Quantum to return too.

Hopefully this time the gun barrel will be AT THE BEGINNING.

The What? The What of the What What?

I was once asked to describe what Quantum of Solace is about in a tweet.  140 characters isn't enough.  140 words wouldn't be enough.  This is the quantum mechanics of the Bond franchise.  Compared to the Bond by numbers of the Brosnan era and the brutality of Casino Royale, Quantum of Solace is confusing.  But not that confusing.  You won't need Professor Brian Cox to do a DVD commentary.


Quantum of Solace is Daniel Craig's tricky second album. 

OK, it's a film and not an album but you know what I mean.  How to follow Casino Royale?  Well, you don't have to follow it, you can continue from it.

'You shits! I've only had this car five minutes'

Quantum of Solace uniquely sees us picking up from where we left him at the end of Casino Royale.  Although he does seem to have changed suits. Mr White is in the boot as Bond rally drives around a well placed quarry before arriving in Siena.  This is a car chase that Roger Moore could only have dreamed of in The Spy Who Loved Me.  Now I'm not quite sure what we're doing in Siena or even Tuscany but we'll go with it.  In what can only be described as a sewer, MI6 set about interrogating Mr White to find out just who he is and who he works for.  We'll soon find that the organisation he works for is Quantum, a 21st century S.P.E.C.T.R.E. but infinitely more insidious and shadowy.  Quite literally, Quantum has people everywhere as displayed by a good old fashioned double agent.  Our double agent, Mitchell, is pursued by Bond across rooftops and over vehicles before an ingenious sequence where the pair cling to scaffolding reminiscent of a Newton's Cradle.  Bond prevails before we are launched into one of the more bizarre Bond themes.

An unlikely duet of Jack White and Alicia Keys belt out our theme song.  It's clunky and unorthodox, a far cry from Dame Shirley but it kind of works.  Once again we've got to the theme song and we haven't seen Craig do an opening gun barrel.  The gun barrel is incorporated into the film's closing credits when Bond has finally gained closure from Vesper and is 'truly' James Bond.

The investigation into Mitchell's double agent status sees M get the hump over her judge of character and some unwanted Christmas presents.  What's more pertinent are the dodgy banknotes he had floating around.  Some fancy computer work takes Bond to Haiti and Dominic Greene.  Bond bumps into Camille in an improbably shiny Ford Ka before we find out who Greene really is.

Greene is an environmentalist on the surface.  We take a deep breath and hope this doesn't take us towards Die Another Day territory.  It's OK though as we find that Greene is a member of Quantum and has some dodgy dealings with big chinned Bolivian General Medrano.  Greene and Quantum have taken steps to restore the General to despotic power in Bolivia in exchange for a patch of desert.  This is Bolivia so there must be some marching powder about?  No,  Medrano assumes Greene is after oil and laughingly lets him have the plot of land convinced it's worthless.  In an act of revenge Greene gives Camille to the General and diverts his attention elsewhere.  Cue some maritime fun.  The opening car chase and now this boat chase are at breakneck speed, in fact, the whole film is.  Quite a contrast to the slow building tension of Casino Royale.

Medrano isn't the only one that assumes Greene is after Bolivian oil as we see the CIA do a deal with him, much to the annoyance of Felix Leiter.  A CIA director with a 'tache bigger than his brain tries to play hardball (that's what the Americans call it, yeah?) with Greene before striking a deal to turn a blind eye to Greene's plans in exchange for a drop of the black stuff. This all takes place mid air before Greene pops down to Austria to enjoy a spot of culture.

Bond gets his phone mixed up with Snake's Codec

Our night at the opera is a glorious sequence.  Bond actually does a bit of spying before acquiring a goody bag in the gents.  This goody bag means he can listen in on and identify many of Quantum's members as Tosca rages on stage.  He hasn't cracked the scheme yet but he sets about putting some names to faces.  This is quite an achievement as most of the faces look like stills from Metal Gear Solid.  Let's hope Bond doesn't turn out to be a genetic experiment or bump into Revolver Ocelot.  Bond's extraction from the meeting he has gatecrashed is problematic and ends up with the death of a member of Special Branch.  Bond doesn't actually kill him but still ends up having his privileges revoked.  Bond has gone renegade. Again.

Bond needs to get to La Paz but doesn't have a passport or any cash.  He also doesn't have any allies at hand so turns to Rene Mathis.  The last time we saw Mathis he was being tasered and carried away for 'debriefing' having been identified as a crony of Le Chiffre.  It appears he's actually innocent.  Bond appeals to Mathis' warrior instinct and ropes him into a trip to Bolivia via a swanky aeroplane bar and several (6) Vesper martinis.  Mathis is a walking pharmacy but Bond sticks to gin and a twist.

Upon landing in La Paz we encounter Agent Strawberry Fields (groan).  The delicious Gemma Arterton is connecting Craig's Bond to his predecessors, especially Connery.  The chemistry between Craig and Arterton is great.  It's a shame she doesn't last too long.

The reintroduction of Camille comes before a final farewell to Mathis and the uncovering of Greene's real plan.  Bond is identified as a threat to Greene and dear old Dominic uses his General in high places to frame Bond.  This time for the apparent murder of Mathis.  The final scenes with Bond and Mathis are touching as Bond realises that to be a spy he has to be alone and will, ultimately, have to sacrifice himself.  Mathis' unceremonious disposal by Bond sees Bond put his armour back on.  He won't allow others to get too close again.

With Camille in tow we head to the air again to take in a survey of the land Greene has acquired.  Handily, Camille is Bolivian Secret Service and has some orienteering skills.  Our sky bound jaunt is shortlived as Bond is shot down and has an almost Moonraker-esque parachute moment before crashing into a cave.  The true extent of Greene's scheme is revealed as the local water supply has been dammed off.  Greene fooled everyone into thinking he was after oil when, in reality, he plans to hold the country to ransom over utilities.  Eon and nPower better be kept an eye on.

I'm glad I'm not cleaning those sheets

Bond returns to La Paz to find M in his hotel room.  Now we know that whenever M goes into the field something bad happens and true to form we find that Agent Fields has been killed.  Greene has had Agent Fields killed in an oily homage to Goldfinger.  We've shed the 60's sensibility that saw a strategic cushion protect Shirley Eaton's modesty and are shown Arterton's full curvy death.  M orders Bond arrested and is concerned he is fuelled only by revenge.  All too easily Bond escapes but not before adding a touch of class by insisting Agent Fields' is recognised for her bravery.

Quantum of Solace has negotiated itself into a cul de sac before the timely reappearance of Felix Leiter.  It's Leiter's information that leads us to the film's conclusion.  In the middle of nowhere Greene is meeting General Medrano to dot the 'is' and cross the 'ts' on his reclamation of power.  Naturally the meeting takes place in a hotel.  Not an ordinary hotel but a hotel powered by hydrogen.  Yep, liquid hydrogen.  Even Scaramanga would've steered clear of that.  Greene reveals just how screwed Medrano is before our old fashioned Bondian climax.  Plenty of explosions, broken glass and axes don't divert from Camille exacting her revenge whilst Bond extracts the information he needs from Greene.

Greene is abandoned in the desert by Bond.  Both men know he will die in the desert, either by his own hands or by Quantum's as they assume he's told Bond everything.  Bond tosses Greene a can of oil in bitter memory of Agent Fields.  It would appear Greene did spill some of Quantum's beans as Bond travels to Russia and confronts Vesper's 'boyfriend' Yusef.  Yusef is apparently on Quantum's payroll and uses his charms to extract secrets from well placed ladies.  This time she's Canadian.  Bond shows restraint by letting M arrest Yusef.  M softens and officially gives Bond his job back.  We all know that he never left.  By dropping Vesper's necklace in the snow we see Bond gain closure.  This chapter of his life is over.

Overall Quantum of Solace doesn't quite live up to Casino Royale.  That's not to say it's a bad film, it's just it's not very 'Bond'.  The reboot has evolved and it's straying a little far from the apple tree for my liking.  We've had Bond's love story and his tragic revenge but now Bond needs his Aston Martin back and he needs to have a flirt with Moneypenny.  The rumours are that these elements will return and we already know Q gets a new face for Bond 23.  And it's not before time.

James Bond will return in Skyfall.  And I can't bloody wait.  That gun barrel better be at the start as well.

Bourne Again Bond

From the ridiculous to the sublime.  After the debacle of Die Another Day came a substantial wait for new Bond film with a new Bond.  And there was so much scepticism when Daniel Craig was cast.  I remember seeing him bouncing down the Thames in a dinghy and a lifejacket.  Shaking my head at his blue eyes and blond hair, still we knew that realistically Brosnan couldn't carry on.  We also knew deep down that Bond had to change and it was the beginning of another new franchise that kickstarted the reboot.  That's a bit harsh. It wasn't just The Bourne Identity that required Bond to have a radical rethink.  The early 21st Century saw changes.  9/11 was a game changer in the action movie arena so much so that The Bourne Identity was given a different ending after a test screening.  There was a new reluctance to simply fill films full of exaggerated explosions whilst having to reconcile a new face of evil.  The Bond franchise had been struggling since the 80s to replace the Russki or communist threat and so we'd had yuppies and drug barons as main villains.  Now terrorism is the new vogue for a villain.

One of the most surprising things is that the writers of Die Another Day were given the chance to adapt Fleming's first novel.  They pulled it off.  Casino Royale is excellent because it is so different to what came before.  From the black and white Sin City stylised pre credit sequence to the fact that Daniel Craig isn't truly James Bond until he delivers the film's last line we can see that everything has been shaken up.  The appalling CGI has largely been abandoned, gadgets are relegated and Bond has to make do with what he's got, and to begin with, that's not a lot.  That's not to say that Casino Royale alienates it's predecessors. Sure, there's no Moneypenny, there's no Q but we're given a SPECTRE for the 21st century, represented by Mr White.  We're dropped off in Miami, harking back to Connery's glory days in Goldfinger and all the while we see a rough and ready newbie James Bond develop and become the double 'O' agent we all know.

After getting his required statistics to become a double 'O' Bond is sent to Madagascar to find  a terrorist.  Meanwhile, Le Chiffre, is being introduced and he's a bit of a gambler with a penchant for shorting stocks.  What ties this together is he's guaranteeing the stock price's crash by using the bombmaker being chased by Bond.

Good job it's not a Blackberry

Bond is a blunt tool at the moment.  He has his target and will go through anything to get to it.  Bond's lack of subtlety and finesse is perfectly shown by his Hulk smash through plasterboard as the free running bombmaker bounces away like a gazelle.  Bond eventually gets his man and makes a right mess of an embassy before revealing that he's quite nifty with a smartphone and a laptop.  On the strength of a cryptic text message Bond hops off to the Bahamas.  It's actually believable and real, unlike some of Roger's leaps of faith.

The Bahamas are what you'd imagine except they seem to be exclusively populated by Ford cars.  Getting hold of an Aston Martin looks like a fool's errand.  But Bond has found his next 'slimy bugger' to track and sets about kicking his arse at poker acquiring, not only, said Aston Martin, the bad guy's missus but a couple of bars of Monty Norman's Bond theme as well.  A gentle nod that the Bond jigsaw is being put together.  Bond is still lacking finesse as his idea of foreplay is basically an interrogation of Dimitrios' missus.  By luck it works and Bond is off to Miami to save a massive jumbo jet from being messed up by Le Chiffre's scheme.

Look, I'm creepy and I can count, so don't mess

Bond is shown as a smirking killer who likes running, lots of running, as Le Chiffre's plan fails to go up in a petrol driven mess.  Even Connery wasn't shown as this much of a bastard.  The Miami police and airport security really aren't very bright as they happily shoot away at a petrol tanker whilst Bond displays some handy driving skills. The Number shows his maths skills by working out exactly how much money he has lost ($101,260,000).  Never fear, he's got a plan B.  The eponymous Casino Royale will be home to a $100 million poker game which Le Chiffre reckons he has a good chance of winning although it just so happens that Bond is the best player around.  So, our villain is a compulsive gambling asthmatic who leaks blood.  Not exactly Mr Big.  In fact, Le Chiffre is a bit rubbish.  So who is the real baddie?

Best worry about that later as despite a new Bond we have the same old mistakes.  Bond gets on a train.  AGAIN.  This time he gets away with it as there aren't any freaks hiding in the wardrobe, just an introduction to Vesper Lynd.  She's 'the money', 'every penny of it' and sets about starting some glorious word sparring with Bond.  The flirting and one upmanship is hundreds of times better than Roger smarming over Triple X.  Lynd's barbs result in Craig's Bond making a series of unusual faces, the best one makes him look like he's been startled whilst passing solids.  So, now we have also done away with the traditional Bond girl that had been so caricatured by Jinx and have something entirely new.  Lynd is an integral part of the story, essential to Bond's progress and is closer to Lady Macbeth than we're probably comfortable with.

More use than Mathis

Lynd and Bond meet Mathis who serves as nothing but an infodump at various points in the film.  Until his apparent betrayal  Mathis is largely irrelevant and only serves to tell silly Americans how poker works.  Imagine if the producers had stuck to Bond tradition and had him playing Baccarat.  Mathis would probably have had to talk directly to the camera like Garth in Wayne's World.  The poker game rumbles on and is punctuated by some scenes that are quite violent for a Bond film.  The film's pacing is corrected by Bond's tumble down the stairwell in a fight scene that is pure Bourne and yet after this we see Bond at his most compassionate and vulnerable.  The shower scene with Lynd isn't what you'd expect but now we have an emotionally vulnerable Bond and he's falling in love.

Now Bond is angry and this leads to him making mistakes.  The security is lax enough in the hotel but Bond is oblivious to the fact that he's about to be poisoned.  Rohypnol must be rife in this hotel.  Our rebooted Bond show's a resourcefulness that would make Moore's head spin as he grabs a salt shaker.  It's only when he staggers back to his car for a conference call and a defibrillator that things get a tiny bit silly.

Angry, but not Rain Man

With the help of a very quiet Felix Leiter Bond defeats Le Chiffre and then things get a little confusing.  In the roll of a car, Le Chiffre is taken by the CIA, but not, Lynd is 'kidnapped', Mathis becomes a traitor and Bond is tied to a chair.  Out of nowhere the story has exploded and it won't be until the end that we'll be able to put the debris together properly.

The torture of Bond is probably the most graphic that a Bond film has ever been.  The violence and claustrophobia perfectly balanced by Bond's ball scratching quip.  It's a bleak situation before deus ex machina in the form of Mr White.  He's back and we still don't know who he is.

Bond is whisked away for hospitalisation and some r and r.  I'm still not entirely sure what Lynd was expecting him to be capable of with his bashed up meat and two veg, but I suppose they're in love.  Now we know from previous experience that Bond isn't allowed to fall in love and so it transpires.  Another doublecross and a well placed text message sees Lynd expire and Bond come back to the fold.  His half hearted escape from MI6 comes to an end in Venice and praise be to God that there's no sign of that fucking pigeon. The Venice sequence presents us with a few questions that niggle long after the film.  If you're going to be a double agent like Vesper surely you'd put a password lock on your phone?  Or if you're that guilty about it all let a few things slip to the bloke sleeping next to you or maybe he was to involved with that Sony Vaio?  Who are 'the Organisation'? Oh, and who the bloody Hell was the bloke with the eyepatch?

Apparently Daniel Craig got the role of Bond due largely to his turn in Layer Cake.  If this is true than the end of Casino Royale is a cheeky homage to this.  Standing over Mr White on the hotel steps Craig delivers his first 'Bond, James Bond' line and now we see him truly become Bond and the full theme kicks in.

Now he's Bond and he's a fucker with a mobile

James Bond will not return. He will continue in Quantum of Solace and hopefully the title song will be a bit better.